On today’s episode, we welcome back Shawntres Parks from Couples Learn. We went live on Facebook recently to follow up on our previous episode, Your Needs or You’re Needy, which aired a couple months ago! Since shelter in place orders occurred in LA first, we wanted to go deeper into attachment styles and their responses to the stress of the Coronavirus and quarantining with a partner!
When our worlds were turned upside down about a month ago and we were encouraged to shelter in place, new couples faced an immediate need to make a choice in their relationship: shelter in place together or take the isolation route. This could place new and existing couples without a strong foundation to their relationship under the microscope to show where the weak points live.
Shawntres gave us her top five tips to live a healthy quarantine life with your partner! They are:
- Provide structure for a routine- whether that’s homeschooling your children or scheduling time for creating individual space form your partner, boundaries will help you manage expectations and conflict!
- Having space in the day to care for ourselves is crucial- take a bath, go for a walk, read a book in silence, meditate or exercise are all great ways to practice self-care.
- Take the pressure off- there is no great need to have an immediate sense of urgency right now. If our kids’ school work needs to be completed over summer, so be it!
- What are my big three things I need to accomplish today- all else can wait so that you can maintain balance in your life as it exists today.
- Having awareness for your attachment style while sheltering in place with your partner will go a long way to lessening the closeness we may feel physically, while helping us understand our partner’s needs.
During our conversation, Shawntres mentions a great resource to resolve conflict which you can find here: Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson
Tune in to the full interview and if her message resonates with you, connect with Shawntres at coupleslearn.com or on Instagram @sparks_therapist
If you’re looking for more support in your quarantine life, join our community group calls with Dave each Tuesday at 7 PM MST by clicking here now!